That’s a Stabbin’…
As I was sitting with some friends at a Dynamo tailgate party today, we noticed a skinny young girl (looking to be in her very early 20s, if that) loitering around us. Before we knew it, she started talking to one of the girls, and hence forth called her “Blondie”. Well, Blondie gave her the stink eye and got up and walked away. Strange girl kept yelling after her “Hey Blondie, hey, I’m still talking to you”. I was sitting on the grass eating a hamburger during this time … and then she turned to me.
Strange girl: You know you can get parasites from sitting on the grass.
Me: Oh yeah, I love the parasites. I can’t wait.
Strange girl: You like parasites?
Me: Well, who doesn’t?
At this point Blondie walks back and thus begins another conversation…
Strange girl: Hey, I was talking to you. Didn’t you hear me?
Blondie: Oh, I’m deaf. Well, in my left ear.
Strange girl (turning to me): Is she really deaf?
Me: Oh yeah, totally. Left ear. Can’t hear a thing (while pointing to my right ear)
Strange girl starts kicking around a soccer ball that some of the guys had been kicking around and then looks at me.
Strange girl: You know you can get parasites from hamburgers. If the meat isn’t cooked thoroughly.
Me (while pointing at the medium rare burger): Oh yeah, I love ‘em. Can’t wait!
Strange girl: You’re strange for liking parasites.
Next she turns to another one of the girls who had been raving about her salon stylist and thus begins another bizarre interjection…
Strange girl: Is she homosexual? I mean, you said she was just great and all.
Salon girl (looking at me bewildered): Umm, no…
She then starts to interject into other people’s conversations as well. Not too long after that, we all get up and go in to the stadium to watch the game. Where Salon girl asks me if she was someone I knew and I was like…
“Hell no, I thought she was a bum. I wanted to tell her to get the fuck away from me, but I was afraid she was gonna stab me… or steal my burger.”
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wtf? thats some weird shit. you should call her “Chupacabra” instead of “Strange Girl” (sorry for the horrible MLS humor there
)
Good idea!
Yeah, I expect anything from anyone, especially from weird people I don’t know.
I like strange girls. I like the way you shut her up. I have other ways of shutting up strange girls.
I don’t have to think too hard to figure out your methods Mr. X …
I saw one of “those people” yesterday, walking down a busy street. He was wearing a small backpack, not as dirty as you might think. ( I didn’t stop to smell ) When I first noticed him I thought he was dancing with himself. Wiggling around, arms flying in all directions. At a red light a cop came up beside him and he bent over and looked in, said something and then walked through the red light, “dancing”. After the cop passed him he shot the bird at her. I noticed she turned at the next street. Wondering if she has six knifes in her skull now.
There are some crazy ones out there, even here in Kansas.
pics of burger?
Sorry, no pix…